Fast Life’s Official Unofficial Showtime Shameless Awards with Shanola Hampton

Fast Life File
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by Chris LaMonica
March 23, 2012

With just two weeks remaining in the sensational sophomore season of Showtime's hit Series Shameless, Shanola Hampton cast as Veronica Fisher visited The Fast Life to co-host and decide the winners of the first annual Fast Life's Official Unofficial Shameless Awards.  When Ms. Hampton learned she would be selecting the "winners," she responded in true Veronica fashion by saying "and you know I'm gong to keep it real!" Listen to the show above and then post your own "winners" in the comments below!

Shanola's selections appear in red.

Most Shamelessly Valuable Gallagher Moment of Season 2

• Fiona    “First Keeping the money and the returning the Louis bag”
• Lip        “Receiving oral favors while Jodi serenades Karen”
• Monica  “Stealing the squirrel fund”
• Frank     “Hiring the one armed man with the ketchup”
• Carl       “Watering the plants a week early”

Best Shameless Fight Scene

• Lip vs. Ian in the house
• Lip vs. Ian under the train
• Sheila Jackson vs. Granny Gallagher at the reception
• Karen vs. Lip in the backyard by the pool

Best Shameless Chase Scene

• Fiona running from Lucy Joe
• Frank running from the cops
• Lip and Ian running from Mandy’s father

Best Shameless Use of a Johnson in a Scene

• Jody with Fiona and Frank under the table
• Veronica attacking Kevin with the garden shears
• Frank and Granny Gallagher laughing at Lip in the bathroom

• Best Shameless Murder scene

• Dottie aka Butterface sexed to death by Frank Gallagher
• Sheila Jackson suffocating Granny Gallagher
• Malik’s father shanking Ethel’s husband Clyde in prison
• Veronica granting permission for the senior citizen softball game

Most Shameless Sex Scene

• Jody and Sheila
• Jody and Karen
• Ian and Mickey at the baseball park
• Ian and Mickey in the convenience store
• Frank and Dottie aka Butterface
• Fiona and Craig Heisner
• Fiona and Jasmine

The Funniest Clean Shameless line by a Gallagher

• Fiona Gallagher     “At least it’s chocolate”
• Frank Gallagher     “No, no, not with all the King's Vaseline!”
• Lip Gallagher         “Go learn your state capitals.”
• Granny Gallagher   “You pathetic bed wetting excuse for a son”
• Debbie  Gallagher  “I can't share a room with someone in constant state of arousal!                                           I'm  going to be a woman soon."

The Funniest Clean Shameless line by a Non-Gallagher

• Veronica    “Sometimes it's a boob shake.”
• Veronica    "Have fun in the Viagra triangle!"
• Jody           "University of River Phoenix, it's all online."
• Kevin         "Those are the ugliest pair of flesh pants I've ever seen."

The Funniest Shamelessly Incorrect line :

• Fiona Gallagher   “Start filling cups with apple juice or I'll have you and                                                            your commie fetus deported faster than you can say Saigon.”
• Frank Gallagher   “Freaking NAFTA”
• Monica Gallagher  "We’re all going to speaking slant eyes and eating egg rolls.                                                 No wonder we  can’t win a war!”

Best Shameless Line Using the word “white”

• Veronica Fisher     "That’s the dirtiest white boy in America."
• Veronica Fisher     “If God liked me he would have made me white and rich”
• Sheila Jackson      “Nancy Grace! There has to be a missing white girl somewhere”

Most Shamelessly Likely to Happen in Season 3

• Veronica and Kevin do not purchase the Alibi Room and instead go into the sex toy business selling Shameless Sexy Post-It notes

• Showtime cuts the wardrobe budget and Estefania joins a nudist colony

• Kevin and Veronica find Ethel pregnant; she dies in child birth and they raise her child

• Sheila Jackson finally leaves the house to only live in the tent with Jodi as Lip and Karen take over the house

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